Do not even suggest that. As much as it might fuel my fantasies, I will not be the one to suggest anything to your mother."His consternation made me laugh, and I told him I would not suggest anything to anyone. I felt as if we had regained the even keel we had started with, so all seemed once again correct in my world.At the appropriate moment, Jason and I arranged ourselves in front of the officiant, then turned as we heard the first notes of the music, signaling the entry of the women. I saw Clara first, wearing the dress that she had designed herself; she looked stunningly radiant. I felt Jason puffing up a little beside me, and I glanced at him with a bit of a smirk. He shrugged his shoulders as if to say, 'What can I do? I love her and she's beautiful.'Behind Clara a vision suddenly appeared, on the arm of her father. In that instant, all of the other people disappeared. There was only one person for me, and she was smiling at me, and walking toward me, and I knew we would be. My friend Lee and I got as close as it is possible for two women to get and not be lovers. She showed me things about myself that I never even dreamed of. I became a sexual woman and it was all right somehow. That night I mixed the ashes of Lee and her husband Ted, I felt a closure I simply cannot describe. I know I cried for hours, then I awoke to a resolve, knowing what I had to do. I knew of just one family member, Lee’s brother, Jerry. He was out there somewhere, so I began the search. I suppose I could have just taken the assets that dropped in my lap, there is a lot of it. After all, Lee had made me the Personal Representative of the estate. She trusted me. I found the records for stock funds, bank accounts. There was annual checks coming in from a big Casino win. A home in Reno, another in Portland, vehicles, yes a lot of it. I tried the internet, no luck. I searched phone books in dozens of cities around New York, nothing. It was like Jerry didn’t exist. I dug through stacks.
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